Compassion and finding the Servant Heart
Am I a heretic? If there is a hell, am I going there?
That was a question I asked myself with a lot of amusement, one night as I sat down to meditate. I come from a family of devout Christians, and my recent foray into the eastern religions have been met with mixed reactions.
Is any of what I’m exploring and writing about – the ego, enlightenment - offensive to Christians? As if on cue, a Christian blogger made contact the next day, and we entered into an email conversation about the servant heart – Compassion, and the contrast between self sacrifice and self love. The results were very interesting – and I’d like to share them here.
Stephen Miracle was the man who contacted me; he’s an intelligent blogger, and he has a huge heart. He runs AltNoise.Net – an inspirational blog with a Christian focus. Amongst other things, Stephen is also a church consultant and public speaker. And as he describes in his biography, Miracle really is his name. (Now I’m feeling a bit insecure about how plain and boring my name is, so I’m changing it. Please refer to me as Gorgeous Foong from now on.) You can find his contribution to the discussion at The Secret to True Personal Development.
Finding compassion within
Our discussions focused on the balance between working on yourself – finding Love within – and finding love for others. His approach – a very beautiful and commendable one – was to do both at the same time. Heal yourself, find compassion for your own being, and at the same time, find love for others.
In the Flower of Love, I wondered about the same thing – is it possible to find unconditional Love by practicing it? Is it possible that compassion is a skill to be learnt, a habit to be developed – until one day practice love gives way to Love?
The path that I am on, is to find Aloneness. To heal all your own wounds, to find yourself, to accept yourself so completely that Love begins to arise. And from then on, as you begin to find joy and peace - your actions, your thoughts, will begin to change.
When that happens, compassion is no longer a choice, but something that is beyond your control. For as you go deeper into yourself, you find there is no difference between loving yourself and loving others.
A hungry man, straight out of a long ordeal alone in a desert – the first thing he seeks is food and water. He seeks to fill his own stomach first. Tell him to give the water he finds to those around him, and what are the chances he would agree? If he was full, happy, rested – perhaps he would have done it of his own accord. What of the rich misers, you might ask? What of those who burn their stores of food rather than affect the market prices?
Love is the answer – Love is nourishment for our soul, the same way water rescues our bodies from death. Once Love overflows, then no one has to tell us – we begin sharing naturally. Perhaps the misers, the Ebenezer Scrooges of the world, have all their riches in the world but have nothing inside themselves. How can someone who is happy not share it? A happy man smiles and makes others do the same, a sad man frowns and wants everyone to do the same. A happy woman creates and sings, an angry woman destroys and screams.
Finding compassion without
Stephen then offered - what if it became a habit? None of us are born with the habit of waking up and brushing our teeth. What if we pushed ourselves until serving others became second nature? It struck me as a very good point – I’ve always said that there was no difference between being kind to others and to ourselves. We are all interconnected ; all the separation - they are artificial.
I’ve mentioned before, in the Love and Compassion meditation, that everything is in our head, and modern science agrees. Our brains are cut off from the world; it sits inside our bodies. The senses pick up information from the world and constructs an image with our own mind-stuff. We have no idea what’s out there; everything we think we see is merely an internal construct. And so when we hate someone – we are hating a portion of our own mind, a section that has been given the appearance of someone external. And with that same logic - when we develop kindness, who is it really directed towards?
When does Compassion arrive?
And another brilliant point from Miracle – when do we return to the outside world? How long does one need before he finds compassion? What if a woman needs ten years to find her servant heart?
A great question, and one that I have no personal experience to answer with. I would say that if it takes ten years, then let it take ten years. It would be ten years well spent. The Buddha took six years; the impact he left behind can still be seen today. But the problem is obvious - we live in a different era, we have different demands and expectations. Contemplatives no longer have a place in our society.
But perhaps the mere act of working on ourselves is already a benefit to others. How so? Just a small example, perhaps a silly one that means nothing, but the only one I can offer at this moment.
I have always tried to give some coins to the beggars on the street. But why? A varied mix of emotions and motivations. A touch of fear - what if they bit me or harassed me? If I had someone next to me, especially a woman – then I simply wanted to appear generous. And when I heard of Karma, when I studied the various spiritual Laws that are said to govern our existence, what was I thinking then? Perhaps God will give me something worth ten times as much in return. If I ever fell down, God would send someone to pick me up, just as I am picking someone else up right now. It was nothing more than a cold calculation; I was putting money in the spiritual bank, hoping to accrue interest.
But recently, I’ve been coming out of my aloneness. I had not yet found the Love within, but the urge was just too strong. And this time everything felt different. I saw a homeless man one night, strumming his guitar outside a 24 hour convenience store. No longer did I have to tell myself to give; in fact I had to remind myself not to give too much - I needed the money to buy petrol. It was just a natural reaction; no different to sneezing when my nose was tickled. Without thinking, I just sat down next to him, giving him all the coins I had. I wanted to hear his song, to listen to his story, turn his frown into a smile. Just a minor action, was I a saint for doing so? No. But it was quite possibly the first time in my life that an act of kindness had not been premeditated – and as such, an act that was truly selfless.
Osho called us all carbon; hard, solid, impenetrable. We cast shadows underneath the sun – everywhere we go, we block off the light that sustains those around us. But as we begin to find Love – the rock begins to change into a diamond, and then we let the light through. But we have nothing to do with it – we are not the source of the light, we are just an instrument. We simply allow the light to come through – and it is perhaps made all the more brilliant for our presence. I was reading some Christian literature recently, and everywhere I go I find this saying: “God works through me. I am merely His instrument.” Is it possible this is what they are pointing to?
I would love to hear what my readers think.
Link Love
Just one today, because it’s a special one. I want to say thank you to Consigno, who recently contacted me and we discussed a bit of literature and spirituality. And then, for no reason at all, sent me his own copy of a very rare book, one that I couldn’t find anywhere else, the Book of Mirdad. I really appreciate it – what a precious gift!
What’s next?
The pifalls of compassion. Yes – you read that right. Tickled your curiosity? Stay tuned!
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26 Comments, Comment or Ping
Quint
Hi Albert,
As a former Christian myself who has some curiosity about Eastern religions, your article really caught my eye. I have a bunch of questions for you, but they don’t belong here, so I’ll probably send them via email.
On the subject of your article, it is impossible to give something you don’t have. If you don’t have love and respect for yourself, you can’t share it with others. If you can’t muster compassion for yourself, there is no other source of compassion to give to others.
I wrote an article a little while back that discussed the command to love others as yourself. We have really dropped the “as yourself” part of that, and focus on “love others”. Even the Bible recognizes that we have to have love for ourselves to give it to others.
Quint
Nov 20th, 2007
Albert
Hey Quint! Good to see you here again, and yes I’d definitely love to enter a discussion with you re such matters. It’s interesting how I’d be wondering about Christianity and my current path, and BOOM all the Christians start emailing me. Maybe it’s that little Law everyone talks about hehehe.
I totally agree with you on finding compassion for yourself first - if you give it out without having anything inside yourself, then it’s just a fake one. But Stephen raises a fantastic point regarding his habits as well - could they just be two separate paths leading to the one goal?
Thanks for the detailed response, mate
Nov 20th, 2007
Damian | Let that Light Shine On
Albert,
As you may noticed I’ve been a little quiet over the last few months as I’ve been going through a rapid stage of personal Gnosis - I’ve been keeping up with everyone else’s work (yours included) but felt that it was a time to ‘watch the unfolding’ rather than a time of activity.
But now I’m back and I’d like to thank you for this post in particular as it’s touched on many of the concepts or ‘revelations’ that came to me during my hiatus.
I’d like to concentrate for now on the last paragraph and particularly this line - “God works through me. I am merely His instrument.” Is it possible this is what they are pointing to?
Man - everything you see, hear, feel, taste and touch are all emanations of the One, remembering that ‘what is within is without’ points too the realisation that We all contain the Light and each act, word, action and deed are all emanations of that Light shone through the Crystal of our Self. Just like the rainbow that fragments from white light shone through a diamond.
But so too is the Universe and everything around us, including us, an emanation of God shone through the Crystal that is He. Therefore concerning Religions the Question is not ‘Which one is true?’ - the Question is ‘What if they are ALL True?’
Much Love Friend,
Damian
Nov 21st, 2007
Mike S
The really big “leap of faith” is that not only does God work through you, but you ARE God. Of course, thinking such a “thought” we immediately categorize as insanity and this is why the mind will never “explain” it.
As long as we believe we are a “self,” no act is truly “selfless,” since doing “good” for others means we gain “happiness” in return. This is the exchange the “self” demands and anything less is sacrifice.
I do believe, Albert, that you touched it directly when you wrote, “To heal all your own wounds, to find yourself, to accept yourself so completely that Love begins to arise. And from then on, as you begin to find joy and peace - your actions, your thoughts, will begin to change.”
And in taking this logic further, as your actions and thoughts begin to change, the world must follow. I feel that the higher your love of self takes you (revelation/enlightenment), the closer you will get to “selfless” and thus, the closer you get to God. Therefore, it makes sense that complete acceptance/love of self unfolds into a complete acceptance/love of world.
Great topic!
Mike S
Nov 21st, 2007
Albert
Thank you for your comments everyone - I’m glad to see that it has sparked such great reactions. I think this will be a great thread once it develops.
@Damian: Great to have you back, mate! And thank you again for the detailed comment. And that’s a fantastic point you raised. You’re right, of course.
The more I investigate all the religions, the more I’m seeing what you’re saying - that, past the inevitable distortions and misinterpretations, they all essentially point to the same thing. Would love to hear more about your personal Gnosis, as well, if you want to share of course.
@Mike S: I’m really grateful for your perspectives here, as well. You point towards a lot of the wisdom that I agree with, but lack the real-life practical experience or writing skills to put down on the keyboard. You’ve put it into words far better than I can - acceptance and love of oneself makes it automatic to have compassion for everything else.
On the practical level - you have been there before, and you know what others are going through. You also have no more “buttons” to push. On the deeper level, the more aware you become, the more you begin to see that the boundaries are not as solidly defined as you think…
Thanks again everyone, and in particular to Stephen Miracle for initating this conversation.
Nov 21st, 2007
Damian | Awakening towards Ascension
Albert,
Of course I’m more than happy to share - my journey will always be OUR journey (this also applies to everyone that reads this).
My latest batch of posts will each touch on each of the elements of my unfoldement (haven’t they always?
) and I look forward to reading much more of yours.
In that is a veiled request - I’d like to hear more about ‘The Urban Monks Journey’ - dare you?
Much Love Always,
Damian
Nov 21st, 2007
Albert
Hi Damian,
Great to hear that - it’s always good to have companions along the journey, hey?
My journey is also hidden inside my posts…if one uses ones imagination, they can very likely figure out what’s been happening in my private life through my posts, even if I am starting to leave out personal details
Grateful that you are here, as always!
Nov 21st, 2007
Damian | Hmmmm - clever wordplay
LOL - Stop hiding in the foliage of philosophy - I’m calling YOU out.
I want to know what’s happening to my mate Albert - but I ALSO need to keep reading your beautiful art.
I guess I’ve just answered my own question
Take care, and continue BEing the Change,
D x
Nov 21st, 2007
Jean Browman--Cheerful Monk
With me it started with love for others. I noticed one morning that I was usually hard on myself but found it easy to be compassionate and understanding of others. So I made a vow to always be there for myself, supporting myself and trying to bring out the best in myself. It seems silly to do otherwise.
Nov 21st, 2007
Albert
@ Damian: Hehehe, I’m shy
@ Jean: Thanks for stopping by Jean, and fantastic point. Reminds me of this story - it roughly revolves around a bunch of people clumsily trying to feed each other and making a mess of the dining hall, until a little child came along and asked - “why don’t they just feed themselves first?” Thanks for pointing that out.
Nov 21st, 2007
K-L
Awesome article - Albert you are leaping ahead as a writer, I was wowed.
It was the last line that inspired me to comment… about people as God’s instruments.
I watched a movie the other night called 300 about Sparta. I have no idea how historically correct it was… but I LOVED the concept of the movie.
In it, the 300 warriors of Sparta face an army of thousands because they refuse to surrender and become slaves. they value freedom above all else.
Watching this… watching some men leave because they valued their own personal life more… or money more… I understood what it means to ‘give your life to Jesus’, or to ‘be an instrument of God’.
Stripping off the religious connotations for a moment… because it doesn’t matter what one believes in… the point is that as flesh and blood and ego, we are nothing. But when we stand up for an ideal, for a concept… for something greater than ourselves… then we become. We surrender to our own Divinity knowing that death is but an illusion.
This movie, those Spartans, perfectly captured this aspect of our reality.
Nov 21st, 2007
Albert
THIS-IS-SPARTAAAAAAAA!!!
Sorry, you knew it was coming the moment you mentioned an iconic bloke movie…
Thank you for the compliments, KL
Nice analogy - I never thought of Compassion as something greater than ourselves, despite me using that quote. How stupid of me! I had simply wanted to point out how it became more natural, but you really made it “click” together. Thank you.
Nov 21st, 2007
Andrea Hess|Empowered Soul
Great article, Albert. We need to remember the Universal Law of Oneness in all of this (apparently, this Law is less sexy than the Law of Attraction and gets no press these days.) We are all One. Everything is a reflection of the other. Loving ourselves, developing compassion for ourselves IS the same as loving and developing compassion for others.
As Mike S. states above, we ARE God. Embracing our Divinity inevitably leads to recognizing the Divinity in all … because we’re One.
Blessings,
Andrea
Nov 22nd, 2007
Albert
Thank you Andrea - am I the only one who’s sick of the LOA? Heh heh. Great point as well, I’m really loving that every one is chiming in with such insights, I’m just not sure about typing it in officially as I don’t have personal experience with such Oneness and therefore cannot back it up. Good to have you around, as always!
Nov 22nd, 2007
Marie
Albert,
Hi! I had never seen this website until tonight. It was by random chance that I found it. I was intrigued with your post and hope that you don’t mind if I offer a few comments from my own experience as a Christian. I will do my best at writing something coherent. Please do not hesitate to ask for any further clarification on anything that comes to mind!
“God works through me. I am merely His instrument.”
You are right in that this is the Christian understanding of how love works through humans. As a Christian, I am not the source of Love, only an agent. However, Christianity differs from what you’re speaking of because a Christian does not find love as an abstract concept of compassion. Christianity teaches that Love is accepted through the particular person of Jesus the Christ. Love in the Christian sense, is not a noun that is found, but rather a verb that is expressed and experienced in action. We know from our experience that love is given and received in person to person inter-actions, not in an abstract discovery. Like the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. Love is not found in knowledge but in action. This Christian understanding of love is experienced in a daily choice to accept the love Christ has for me, and to reflect that love (like a crystal) to the other persons I encounter.
Christianity teaches that no human can truly offer love by himself. A Christian is not offering his/her love to another person, but rather reflecting the love God has for that particular person. When humans make a machine, they assign the use of that machine. Similarly, humans were created by God to love, and it is only in the Creator that we can find the love we are to reflect. But unlike machines, God has given humans the freedom to say no to being a reflection of love. As a Christian, I receive love not from a mysterious, abstract God, but from a human person who is God. God is the source of Love (God is Love), and my desire for love is fulfilled by the acceptance of my humanity, which the sacrifice of Christ reveals. God did not have to become human, but chose to humble himself to show men and women the love God has for each and every one of them. Christians are not redeemed despite their humanity but through their humanity. Christianity teaches that your weaknesses and wounds cannot be healed by yourself. As with physical wounds, every human is in need of a doctor. That doctor is the person and God that is Christ.
Is this love selfish? Do Christians love only for the reward of Heaven? In many cases, yes. But in many more cases the answer is no. There are many Christian men and women who have been extraordinarily altruistic in giving their lives for the sake of other human beings. They did not have to go to such extreme measures. One example is Maximilian Kolbe: “Maximilian Kolbe was a Polish priest who died as prisoner 16770 in Auschwitz-Birkenau, August 14, 1941. When a prisoner escaped from the camp, the Nazis selected 10 others to be killed by starvation in reprisal for the escape. One of the 10 selected to die, Franciszek Gajowniczek, began to cry: “My wife! My children! I will never see them again!” At this, St. Maximilian stepped forward and asked to die in his place. His request was granted.” (http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/biography/Kolbe.html)
Kolbe did not have to offer his life in order to enter into Heaven. Being a priest, he would have likely gone to Heaven anyway. The desire for reward cannot explain such love. Only the sacrificial love of Christ, which is reflected in the actions of every true Christian.
A final note about your search for aloneness: Christianity teaches the opposite, that we are called to communion with other persons. “It is not good that the man should be alone” (Gn 2:18). When we are alone we are unable to accept or offer love. This is why most Christians are called to marriage where “the two become one flesh” in a community of Love (Gn 2:18). Christian marriage is an earthly symbol of the love Christ has for his bride, the Church. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the Church and gave Himself up for her “ (Eph 5:25). Just like the husband and wife become one flesh, all Christians who are part of the Church, or the Bride become one Body with Christ in Heaven.
Nov 22nd, 2007
Albert
Heya Marie,
Thanks for the brilliant comment, it’s really stimulating my mind. And wow - I appreciate the time you’ve spent on it.
I fully understand what you’re saying. With love as an abstract discovery, I was referring to what I’ve seen in myself - that until I have found love inside myself, my outwardly compassionate actions always have a bit of selfishness inside. That was all I was saying.
And so I was simply wondering that could I move into my aloneness, into myself, until I have enough love and peace inside? And when I do, my outward movement will naturally be compassionate, but without any ulterior motives. Love then comes from the heart, or shines through me from God, so to speak.
And totally agreed about the crystal. I’m just saying that in my experience, until I have enough love for myself, I’m not a crystal, I’m just a rock. My “compassion” then is fake, selfish. And aloneness is not something I’m saying everyone should have or be forever, but I have found my long period of aloneness to be the best period for finding love inside myself.
It is just a temporary thing - I’m just preparing myself to fully enter the world as a new person. Sort of like a butterfly in a chrysalis, or an athlete training his body in the gym until he is prepared for competition. Once we have found it, then we will be able to go out and fully give, give without restraint.
A beautiful story you provide. Kolbe has truly found compassion, something that we should all aim for.
One point you raise that I would love to hear more about: God and Christ as the healer. I would love to hear more about how you let God heal you.
Thank you again for the comment, I’ve really learnt a lot from it.
Nov 22nd, 2007
K-L
I can see why 300 is an iconic guy movie, but I’m a woman and I loved it. I also loved the only woman character too because she was able to put the good of the All before her love for her man… and she was strong.
TO give our all, to give all that we can for a concept or an idea, that is, to give completely of ourselves to make something true…. now that is life. Or is it?
Nov 23rd, 2007
Albert
Yes, I agree - the queen and her strength of character really stood out for me as well - and the love the king and queen shared was shown really subtly and yet beautifully in the last moments of the king’s life. It really stood out, and was a high point for me; more than the action, strangely.
You know I was just having a bit of fun; it’s hard not to yell out one of the catchphrases made famous by 300 when someone brings up that movie.
Nov 23rd, 2007
Jason
Marie’s comment just made me think about something in a different light… that would make Jesus the perfect mirror of God’s love. An interesting way to look at it, or thinking of him as perfect glass, allowing all of God’s love to pass through.
Anyway, Albert… I’m a Christian as well, though I don’t think that I think about things in the same way as most who lay claim to that description, so if you want, I’m more than willing to discuss any issues you choose.
Dec 5th, 2007
Albert
Jason, thanks for the comment. Would love to enter a discussion, please drop me an email if you wish and we can discuss more.
Dec 5th, 2007
jim
wow ! another great piece of mind…… absolutely great
Mar 9th, 2008
Albert
Thank you Jim
Mar 9th, 2008
Victoria
WoW so very Wow…..I find using few words to be so difficult, yet, first I read your writing, your thoughts, your mind working, and the conversation with Miracle and felt so ready to comment in so many ways. Then, I read the comments, and what I feel now, is the other responses and your interaction with them, well, I am just, simply peaceful. To read words as the many above that have arrived here due to their sinking deeply into thoughts of such inner workings, I find such peace. Compassion is a foreign concept to me in ways that others might describe it. I too spent many years as a “Christian”, and so many of them I sought to understand how if Christ was our Savior, our way to “life everlasting”, a perfect example to take hold of and follow, then, why could we not? Why could so many find so much ability to hurt and not heal, to pass on pain and not mend it, and I was in the group. It hurt, all the time, I hurt inside. Then, I began a quest, after the death of a son, to die, from the inside out. Although I felt as though I had been doing that already for years, I really put alot of effort into it. I felt I had true reason to of course. I had “lost a child” as many would say. Well, I was not to die. Alcohol felt like my only friend for so many years and then IT did not quelch my angst. I did begin reading a variety of insightful teachings though, of many peoples and beliefs and found a Higher Power. Now, I did have to go through more than a few questions from Christians in my life, who felt I was on a path to hell because I no longer felt that God, Jesus, the King James bible was the answer to all forever. Yet, now, well Albert, although earth life does seem still to be lacking much compassion still and I have no deep understanding of why we hurt each other and ourselves, I no longer desire to die. I do not fear death, I also do not believe in heaven or hell as a place we go. I have struggles still with “why am I alive” yet, I know I am not alone on that plane. So, back to Compassion…Finding it for self has worked for me the best. My version of it, which, asked to explain, would take me more words than I have already shared. Yet, we are all Life Light Powerful Wonderfilled Healers of self and others, perfect in our imperfections, on paths with others and yet on our own. If ever I feel any need to fill a void of lonely self, I can read your writings, and those of Andrea’s and whoosh…….the balance beam I tread grows wider, the path seems easier, I feel the light that may not shine through me all the time, yet, I know it. I am warmed by it, and I know “God”, of any description and I are One. Thank You All……Uplift from the use of a computer….what a concept!! Goddess Bless!!
Apr 27th, 2008
Albert
Wow Victoria. Thank you for the comment. It really makes a difference to read personal stories, and your courage is very, very, inspiring. Andrea’s blog is fantastic, and I know you’ll continue to get knowledge and courage from her writings. Thank you again for the compliments.
Love in return!
Albert
Apr 27th, 2008
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