Attachment: Understanding the Origin of Human Suffering, Part 1
There was a famous teaching once, a long time ago – Life is suffering. But this statement is ripe for misinterpretation – was he teaching pessimism, defeat? No – for he was simply approaching the problem as a scientist, a doctor, would. This is our disease, he said. Life is suffering. What is the cause, and how do we cure it?
His answer was so simple I refused to believe it for a long time: the origin of suffering is attachment, desire. This teaching is marvellous, for there is nothing in there that cannot be verified simply by looking into your own experience. Look deeply into your own life, the times you have cried, the times you have raged. What was the cause of it all? The next time you are in pain, pause, and look. Ask yourself – why? What am I holding on to?
Without attachment, suffering does not exist. Let go of your attachments, little by little. By and by you will see the freedom, the happiness that is there.
The Misinterpretations
Yet say this to a typical man on the street, and he might answer you with scorn and disbelief. I was at a meeting once, where the speaker touched on this topic. Immediately a man rose from the audience, indignant and full of derisive laughter.
What nonsense! A beggar has nothing to be attached to, and I have yet to see one that is full of happiness! If that was true, they would all be dancing for joy! I’m going to throw away all my money now, and yes! I will be happy!
With that, he left the room, muttering under his breath. The speaker began to explain her statement, but he was not there to hear it. One might consider his response extreme, but please check within – his reaction, in many ways, reflects the disbelief in all of us.
We have spent so much of our lives, every waking moment, following desire. We expend huge amounts of energy and time; we make extreme sacrifices, in the hope of finding happiness by attaining them. But as Lorne Ladner says in The Lost Art of Compassion
And that is the aim of this series – to expand on that statement, to uncover the root of all our unskilful behaviours and pain. This post will prepare us by introducing attachment and uncovering our own. The future posts will touch on desire – and what to do with them.
The Impermanency of Things
The first thing we have to realise: this world is always impermanent, transient. Physical objects come into existence, and fade away. Bodies, cars, buildings, even the mightiest mountains will all disappear one day. And mental concepts are even more fragile – social status, intellectual achievements, and fame – what real permanency will there be? Even the greatest man is just a page in a history book.
But that is not to say: do not treasure them. This is not to say: discard them, mangle them, and abuse them. But simply refuse to find yourself in them; refuse to identify with them; base your self-worth on them. Play with them, enjoy them, nurture them – but realise that one day they will have to go.
If you have become attached to your strength and health, if you rely on your beauty to feel good about yourself, what will happen when your hair begins to turn silver, when your skin begins to sag? If you base your worth on the size of your mansion, the amount of money in the bank, what will happen the day it crumbles? What if you base your life on your lover – that special woman, the man you swear you will die without – what will happen when they move on, or pass away?
Further Reading: Love, Sorrow, and Attachment
Projections of Our Needs
The second thing: when we become attached to something or someone, we do not see it or them as they are. Often, all we see are our projections. We see them for what we think they can provide, or more accurately, what we think we lack. Through a mansion, we seek the respect we feel we lack. Through wealth, we seek security. By finding a lover, or by having endless sex, we think we have love and attention.
But a mansion is just a mansion, money just money. They only have the value we give them, and very so often, we project on to them a false and disproportionate importance. This is even worse when we project our needs on human beings – no longer do we treat them as human beings, but as objects to be used.
And yet explore this for yourself – can the material world give you any of these? Simply pause, and think of the last time you got something you really wanted – good food, good sex, a promotion, or the recognition of your peers. How did you feel? If you felt good, how long did it last for? If these things really filled up a hole inside you, how much more would you need? Wouldn’t the hole have been filled long ago?
The answer might be tricky to see, because of one simple fact – what we crave changes. As a child, it might have been the latest toy. As we grew older, we might have wanted the best clothes, coolest haircut, the hottest boyfriend or girlfriend. As an adult, it might be the biggest mansion, the most loving family, the flashiest car, respect or recognition. If any of these provided satisfaction beyond a temporary relief, we would have been satiated long ago.
The Value of Looking Deeply
The point of this exercise is simply to come to realisation that the content of the wanting will never satisfy you. It is the wanting, the attachment itself, that is causing the trouble.
Yet an intellectual understanding is not enough. I gained an intellectual understanding of this a year ago, and yet subtly I continued my endless search. Please do not cheat yourself out of this exercise – a true understanding, one from the heart and not from the mind, is required. Please continue this inquiry, however long it might take, until you see for yourself how it is the desire itself that is causing your discontent. Or you might eventually decide otherwise; that is also fine. Honour your own experience.
If you come to the same conclusion, it is possible for our attachments to fall away on their own. But if they don’t, then at the least, we will develop a willingness to let go of them – the methods for which will be covered in the rest of the series.
Pleasure and Enjoyment
There is a common outcry at this point that needs to be addressed: does letting go of our attachments mean we sacrifice our happiness? Do we turn into lifeless, emotionless shells, or do we retreat and live in a mountain?
On the contrary! Attachment and detachment is internal – one could easily give up all her wealth and still be upset because she is still attached to them internally. In the same way, one could have all the wealth in the world and enjoy it immensely without any attachment.
True detachment, not a melancholic surrender, allows us to truly savour the moment. It allows us to play with and enjoy what we have. Knowing it will soon pass allows us to enjoy each moment, come what may.
Just an example – when you are not attached to your lover, there is no fear of loss when you hold them in your arms. When you do not rely on them to feel safe or to feel loved, there is no anxiety when they are away. When you do not seek to find yourself in them, you allow them to be just as they are. The mind games fade away, the manipulations drop – and the feeling gets deeper, and deeper, more genuine.
Try it for yourself, and see if it is not true of any attachment.
Expanding Awareness
The third point: for many, the idea of attachment ends with our material possessions. But attachment is so much more; we are attached to everything in our perception. We cling to our ideas; we cling to sensual pleasures and sensations.
How many of us have gotten into an argument over an idea, a symbol, a concept? In A New Earth
On a similar note, how many of us cling to our moments of happiness, and run away from the sadness? Moments of happiness will always end, sadness will always be a part of life. Others even do the opposite, and take identity in our misery.
Aversion is Attachment
It is important to note that many forms of attachment are deceptive. We don’t realise another simple truth: aversion is attachment. The more we hate something, the more we cling to it. This is not to say that we should not protect ourselves, or remove ourselves from someone who is causing us harm. But look into your internal world – is this not true?
Is there anyone you hate with a passion? How often do thoughts of them, or fantasies of revenge, enter your mind?
How about your feelings – when you get angry, or sad, do you force it down? Do you deny yourself these feelings; do you contract and harden up internally? Is that not a form of attachment to your suffering? What if you were simply to accept them, without acting on them? They dissipate almost immediately.
The Self
And so this begins to carry across to the biggest attachments and aversions of all – a false self-image. When someone calls you a name, when someone spits at your feet, what has been hurt?
We’ve spoken of how light is faster than sound. And yet there is nothing to fight over, for when we do, we are merely fighting over mental concepts. And yet consider this – perhaps who the mind thinks you are, is simply another mental concept, a mere idea of “you”, that you have mistaken for yourself. When someone calls you stupid, weak, insignificant, look into it – what has been hurt?
Is it possible that it is merely an image that has been challenged, that our anger arises from an attachment to a mental concept? Is it possible a self-image is just that – an image?
It is the same with those who hate themselves. What are they hating? What is the core of low self-esteem? Hatred for an image, a thought.
It is important to note the difference between cherishing ourselves, and cherishing a self-image – a subtle but important distinction; for some will misinterpret this as saying we should not protect ourselves when threatened.
Further Reading: The Beauty of Impermanency and The Illusion of the Ego
An Investigation
Understanding is the first step to change, and this post is the start of a series that examines attachment and craving. It will eventually lead on to the behavioural mastery series, where we begin to examine solid practical steps to change.
Armed with this knowledge, you could begin to see where your own attachments are. Please try the following – and the investigation on attachment given above – as homework, and if you wish, share your results in the comments.
Analyse everything you indulge in – positive or negative. What does your partner mean to you? What do all the important people in your life represent? Who are you averse to, or attached to? What are you averse to, or attached to?
What does all your cravings, and pleasures, mean to you? What do you spend a lot of your time doing? Perhaps you are addicted to chocolate, sex, or even the internet. What do you fantasise about a lot – happy or unhappy? What takes up most of your mental space? Do you spend a lot of time on your appearance, your career, or your car? Bring awareness to all these, write them down for yourself.
What are the behaviours that you would like to change? Do you say yes when you mean no? Do you smile to gain approval? Are you addicted to anything? Do you shout and rage? Do you spend too much time watching television, or feeling sorry for yourself?
You’ll notice that these questions begin to lead into the mundane – following celebrity gossip, watching television, or taking pride in your appearance, for instance. There is nothing wrong with any of that – but for some, the driving forces behind these behaviours reveal something much more painful.
Discontent with your own life, for instance, can lead to an obsession with a glamorous Hollywood lifestyle, living vicariously through the exploits of the stars. Looking at how a famous person has ruined his or her life can provide a temporary relief for how much we hate our own. Obsession with appearance can come from a low self-esteem, thinking that our looks are the only things we can offer the world. It might come from an attachment to being considered handsome. And on the list goes. Be penetrating with your inquiry – the more you put into it, the more you will get out of it.
This is an essential first step in changing your behaviours and understanding the root of our suffering. Please give it a try, and subscribe to get updated when the next part of this series is published.
Link Love
Stanley F. Bronstein (aka Mr. Achievement) is an attorney, CPA, author of 3 books, and a professional motivational speaker. As he tells everyone he meets, his purpose in life is to help others find their purpose and achieve it. Check out his blog at StanleyBronstein.com
Paul Piotrowski over at InspiredMoneyMaker.com runs a Blog which focuses on How to Make Money Doing What You Love. He teaches his readers how to find their purpose and passion in life, and how to transition from working at a dead-end job they despise to doing what they love. Paul talks about one of the biggest success killers being fear, and in his article 14 Most Common Fears in Life and What To Do About Them he touches on the most common fears that often paralyse us in life.
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44 Comments, Comment or Ping
Ben
Dude,
Oh my god, that is the most inspirational thing I have ever read! No Joke!
As a Buddhist I constantly seek an end to suffering and attachment in my life. However, I often find myself attached to things without noticed I have become attached. Great example for you, just logged on tonight to see if I can find help on a computer game I’m struggling with. Just happened to check my reader and saw your post. As I read it I realised I have become attached to this game. I’ve been playing on it for 2-3hrs a day for the past week. Whoa! I can’t believe it. Your post hit me like an arrow through the head, awesome. I can identify with loads of your post’s references to attachments, internet, TV, etc; and I’m a practising Buddhist. Just shows you how easy it is to become attached without knowing it.
You are a true inspiration to me man, even though you might not realise it. You rock!!!!!
Cheers man, I’m off to reassess my attachments without becoming attached to the notion of being un-attached to things!
Peace
May 9th, 2008
Evan
All this is profound and true.
Yet I wonder about the reverse. Those moments of joy. Is detachment really required for them?
I don’t devalue moments of happiness, the more the merrier for me.
For me the elated-calmness has come from reconciling the parts of myself that were fighting with each other. This is a freeing from attachment to identity but in a different way. This has been my path to joy.
I have found no reason to devalue individuality. It sounds like the disciples of Buddha (or Jesus or whoever) had no trouble recognising. The hostility to identity in some Buddhism seems exaggerated to me. Non-attachment to something doesn’t mean that that something doesn’t exist. Our thoughts about something change, this doesn’t mean that the something isn’t there. (If there are only thoughts what is learning - even learning non-attachment.)
Looking forward to the next part.
May 9th, 2008
Albert
@ Ben: Mate, I really appreciate your compliments. Glad you got value from this post, especially the more mundane stuff, as that was a late addition to the post. I noticed a lot of my mundane time-wasters drop away recently from all the internal work (reading entertainment blogs and so on), and I suddenly realised they were all connected. Thank you for the support!
@ Evan: Good to have you here again! It is entirely up to you how you handle the moments of joy. I used to get attached to them, and then get upset (doubly so) when they inevitably went away. Now I am much more peaceful and let them go. So it’s just my personal experience, might be different for other people.
Same with identity, I do believe that there are a lot of misinterpretations (although we can argue all teachings have been diluted to a certain extent), and the “purer” Buddhist teachings do not teach hostility towards the identity, more of a “right view”, seeing it for what it is. This way we do not attach undue importance to certain things. Thank you for the comment.
May 9th, 2008
Evan
Thanks Albert, I’m aware of there being different teachings about the status of identity in the different streams of Buddhism. I just don’t know enough to understand them. If you do and would like to write about it I’d love to read it.
I do think greed/attachment leads to misery. But I think there are differences to. The 20th century spiritual teacher I admire most was Krishnamurti. He seemed to have conquered greed - he just ate whatever his chef prepared for him that was good for him - no cravings at all. And yet he chose to eat what was good for him - and so prolong his life. In this sense he was attached to health and long life. But I think this attachment didn’t lead to misery on his part. So I think there are maybe different kinds of attachment or maybe we need to come up with a different word.
May 9th, 2008
Albert
I think that’s the biggest misconception, from what I gather from talking to various people - taking care of your body, going after goals, and so on - can be done with zero attachment to them. It comes from more a curiousity and common sense perspective. People with no identity and attachment still have common sense. I touch on this briefly in my half written follow up to this post, I think it will make more sense, although it is just my personal experience.
May 9th, 2008
Mags | Woo-Woo Wisdom
Albert, that was an excellent post. I’m glad you touched on the many different things that we can get attached to, from material possessions to identities.
I’m learning to separate the “I am” from “I am X”. For example, I used to be very attached to the identity “I am a writer”, whereas now I prefer “I am, and as a result I choose to experience being a writer now”. Even though “I am a writer” was a positive identity for me, attaching to it didn’t give me the freedom to be other things as well, and especially didn’t give me the freedom to just be!
Loving your blog, and looking forward to the next in the series!
May 9th, 2008
Maha
Please don’t stop!!
This subject is my favorite!I think I’m attached to detachment!!
I find it easy, even strangely enjoyable to detach from things, yet extremely difficult to deal with loss on the relationship level!
I’m looking forward to the coming series.
May 9th, 2008
Priya Florence Shah
Shouldn’t we make a distinction between attachment and desire? Having desires is normal. Attachment however is more like craving for a particular outcome or object of ones desire.
One can desire, yet not be attached to the outcome. That is the basis of the Law of Attraction - feel the desire, and release it, without being attached to the manifestation.
May 10th, 2008
Ben T
Another timely and well written post.
Currently I have a lot of attachments across my life - trivial things like computer games (like my namesake above !), internet surfing and media to distract and escape fears within myself.
The more I have pulled away from these distractions, the more discomfort I have felt emotionally - removing these distractions has revealed these emotional discomforts, and encouraged me to cling tighter to the attachments as a safety blanket
But very little of these attachments are desires - I have a good amount of wealth, but it is for the attachment of security, not the desire for riches to fund other desires. My attachments have suppressed genuine desires for a long time, and recovering that part of me might help with cutting away attachments.
Needless to say, I look forward to more in this series. Until then, to conquer my distractions and attachments to internet surfing at work, I have been trying out a free web tool called “Rescue Time”. I recommend it to others having trouble focusing in there computer work and suffering from internet surfing addiction or attachment. Having something report honestly on your computer habits, and also track any improvement, is very useful for making progress I find.
Thanks Albert.
May 10th, 2008
Albert
First, a general thank you to everyone, for the comments! Now on to the comments that had questions:
@ Priya: Desire and attachment is a very subtle difference, or perhaps they are the same thing. I initially covered it as part of this post, but it got too big so I saved it for the next. I know what you mean, and it is definitely a question I had asked many times myself. Maybe the next part of this series will give a bit of my perspective
@ Ben: Sounds like I might need Rescue time too, hehehe.
May 10th, 2008
Tom Stine | Living from Consciousness
I noticed the comment about attachment vs desire and thought I would chime in. It feels to me that desires move in and out rather easily, just like an emotion, as long as I don’t attach. My experience is that if I have a desire, like right now I would love a cup of coffee, and just let it be a desire, and give it no energy, it passes right out of my system. In a few minutes I won’t even think about coffee.
But if I give that desire just a little bit of energy, just a little bit of attention, it starts to grow. I start thinking about how I can’t make it through the rest of the day, how tired I will be later, how important it is that I go to Starbucks NOW and get that coffee. My impression is that I’ve gone from just desire to attachment to the desire. I’ve fixed on it.
It seems to me that the Buddha was driving at this very thing. Thoughts, feelings, desires, all pass in and out and move through us if we do not attach to them. It is the attachment that leads to suffering. What do you think, Alberto?
May 10th, 2008
Andrea Hess|Empowered Soul
Albert, awesome post as usual! It’s one of my favorite topics - practicing detachment is not easy. Observing ourselves in the moment of attachment - when something good or bad happens, for example - can be of great help. Those are usually the things the ego reacts to strongly - jumping for joy and not wanting that feeling to go, or getting all worked up in aversion. If we can just take a deep breath and notice our thoughts and feelings we’re already taking a big step forward to detachment.
I’m looking forward to your post addressing desire and attachment. I think we can definitely have desire without being attached to it … in fact, we need desire in order to create anything in this life, right?
@Tom - wow, great comment! You’re so right, whatever we focus on expands.
Blessings,
Andrea
May 11th, 2008
Albert
Hey Tom and Andrea - fantastic insights, as usual. Thank you
I’ve got lots half written in my next post, so I won’t repeat them here. My thoughts are on this are not organised enough anyway, so apologies… I’ll put my opinions in the next post 
May 11th, 2008
Tom Stine | Living from Consciousness
Albert–Thanks, my friend. I’m looking forward to the next post.
@Andrea Thanks for the compliment. And you are right, simply getting into a moment of observing ourselves helps immensely with attaching. We are denying the energy necessary to keep it going. I think that’s really what detachment means, to simply deny energy that turns simple thoughts or desires into beliefs and attachments. What do you think?
May 11th, 2008
Angel
As a seual abuse survivor, I suffer from Dissociative Identity Disorder, and struggle with attachment. I had never thought of it being a good thing before, but maybe it is!
May 11th, 2008
Evan
Hi Angel,
For me non-attachment has value because it enables compassion (for joy as well as pain!). When we are caught up in our own thoughts and feelings we don’t have room for others.
Compassion means that it is I who respond. Dissociation can mean that I am unable to respond to the other person. I think it is in this sense that attachment is a good thing. I’d be interested to hear what Albert and others think.
May 11th, 2008
Albert
Hey Angel, first of all, can I just say that I am not a psychologist yet, and this is just my opinion - but I don’t think that DID is a part of the attachment that we are talking about here. I always recommend that one sees a professional (although it sounds like what you are already doing), for things like this. It is not something that can be fixed by reading on a blog or over the internet or anything like that. All the best, Angel!
May 11th, 2008
Liara Covert
Our lives are full of examples where we subconsciously attach to situations, people and views of ourselves. It can seem like a tug-of-war to detach from what feels comfortable or appropriate at a given moment. And yet, constantly challenging your notion of ‘comfort zone’ is perhaps one of the ehalthiest and life-transforming things a human being can do.
May 11th, 2008
Shadowduck
Thanks for another great post Albert! An excellent point that the concept of attachment is a fairly easy one to grasp intellectually but not at all easy to internalise, that’s certainly something I’ve struggled with.
A few people seem to think they have attachment issues with computer games or the internet simply because they spend significant amounts of time on them. Is this necessarily so? I also spend quite a lot of time on the internet and play games sometimes, but it doesn’t bother me particularly if they’re not available to me for some reason - I just do something else. Am I kidding myself, or does the time spent on something give little indication of the degree of attachment?
On a slight tangent; when I read “It is important to note the difference between cherishing ourselves, and cherishing a self-image – a subtle but important distinction; for some will misinterpret this as saying we should not protect ourselves when threatened”, something clicked with me. I haven’t quite pinned it down in my head yet, but I think you’ve moved me along a little in my thinking. Thankyou!
May 11th, 2008
Albert
@ Liara: Thank you, always happy to see you here!
@ Shadowduck: Hi mate! Only you can answer that Q for yourself. Do you do it when you are stressed, when you are angry, or when something happens? If you stop doing it, and you don’t have anything else to do, how do you feel? Are you procrastinating? Are you using it as an excuse not to face a certain part of yourself?
May 12th, 2008
Ravi Raman
Great post!
I’ve learned in my own life that there is a distinction between happiness and pleasure. Happiness is something that comes from within. It is permanent and never-ending. Pleasure is something that comes from the outside. It depends on comparison with others or validation from others.
With this realization,I’m currently well under way with my own life simplification exercise. I realize that many things in my life were giving me pleasure, but not making my happy (and in some cases, making me unhappy!). I realized how importance living simply really is. We diffuse our focus with so much crap that doesn’t matter!
Life is too short for that
http://www.sethigherstandards......fe-update/
May 12th, 2008
Shadowduck
@Albert: Me? Procrastinate?! How dare you! I’m just going to check my RSS feed, answer my e-mail (the ones I don’t put off for now, anyway), check in on my online games, check my RSS feed again, see what’s happening on the forums, check my RSS feed one last time then I’ll be back to tell you EXACTLY why you’re wrong about that!
Meh, I like procrastinating. Relaxation isn’t relaxation unless there’s something you really should be doing.
May 13th, 2008
Warren Wojnowski
Hi Albert. You’ve packed a lot of information into this post. I’m going to focus on the impermanence of things.
You’ve eloquently pointed out that all things are temporary. It occurs to me that, while all things are temporary, so many of us focus our thoughts and attention on ways to establish permanency. We look for such things as permanent relationships (supported by vows such as “till death do us part”), permanent employment, permanent residence … or whatever.
We’re socialized into thinking “permanence” in so many areas of our lives which then promotes and reinforces our sense of attachment to things and outcomes.
If we were to embrace the notion that all things are temporary, and then come from that place, the degree of attachment you talk about would be greatly lessened and yet our sense of enjoyment of things would be greatly enhanced.
What a wonderful world it is we live in.
Thanks for a terrific post.
May 13th, 2008
Albert
@ Ravi: Man that is brilliant. I could not describe the origin of happiness any better. I’ve been finding the same thing in my own explorations and could not find a way to describe it.
@ ShadowDuck: I like procrastinating too
It’s just so much more fun when you know you shouldn’t. I gotta explore how to overcome it, hehehe.
@ Warren: Thank you for that - you really put into words what I struggle to. I keep telling my readers that often the real value is in the comments, and you’ve just given another great statement.
May 13th, 2008
Cyrano
Hey Albert,
sometimes, the more you write, the more I feel glad for opening my mind, but at the same time, it seems there is much for me to learn. Thank you
May 13th, 2008
MarbleSlinger
All I can say is wow… I found you on twitter and read “The Journey Of A Thousand Miles Begins With A Single Step”. I found it a wonderful and interesting post. After a few more articles I added you to my RSS feeds. I can honestly say I have never read anything on the internet that I could relate with so much. I’m not as educated as some of your readers seem to be (from your comments) but I can recognize words of wisdom when I read them. Thank you for writing and I look forward to not only reading future and past articles but actually making them part of my life. Again, thank you for giving your time to us all.
BTW, it’s sort of sad that you have to have a disclaimer… but I understand.
May 13th, 2008
bloggersmosaic
awesome post, i didn’t get the full of it but kool
May 13th, 2008
iaara
Very good post. I’ve been reading you for a little while now, and I think this is one of my favorite topic too.
It is sometimes difficult to start a conversation about suffering with people around me; not all of my friends like to read, and if they do, they’re just not interested yet in the quest for happiness. Your posts help me put into words some of my thoughts which makes it way easier to share!
Iaara
May 13th, 2008
Albert
@ Cyrano: Thank you mate
@ MarbleSlinger: That is a very high compliment, thank you. Yes disclaimers suck, but given that everything and anything can be misinterpreted, and that we are discussing emotions and so on, I have to be a bit more careful. It would be different of course if we were just doing technology news and so on.
@ Blogger Mosaic: Thank you too
@ Iaara: And a final thank you to you too. Again, that is very high praise, and I appreciate it.
May 14th, 2008
Ankit
Thank you for this great article !!
May 15th, 2008
Albert
My pleasure Ankit
May 15th, 2008
Barbara
Hi Albert,
Normally I read your articles as soon as you post them.
I looked at the title and saw the word suffering. The day I read it, my own suffering seemed intense. I thought I’d wait awhile before I continued, try to work out my difficulty.
Earlier today, I was writing to myself before I arrived here to finally read the entire article. What I had done was very much like the exercise you describe.
As I’m sure you can imagine, my experience of self discovery would be similar to your own. It seems we all follow patterns in thought and behavior and can’t really ‘escape’ readily.
I got to the last of your article where I knew I struggled a lot, I felt it so clearly. Living vicariously. Not thru movie stars necessarily, but the desire to be able to do what seems only fictious characters or ‘others’ can really achieve.
I do wonder why I would believe that and want to stay attached there.
Thanks for taking me with you to find out.
May 16th, 2008
Albert
Barbara, good to hear from you. I’m glad that my mundane examples are well received! Don’t worry too much about it, you’re doing beautifully. Just keep doing what you are doing
May 16th, 2008
Chris Marshall | Martial Development
Normally, I would try to add something here, but I can only say that you’ve covered this subject quite well.
May 19th, 2008
Albert
Thank you mate! When I get out of my deadlines I will post the rest of this series
May 19th, 2008
hardy
kinda chances by.. and thats is a long read totally mind opening.
-bookmarked-
May 24th, 2008
Roll top desk
I have a friend who uses to joke asking “is there life before death?” A pretty cruel joke but in some cases true. The thing with “life is suffering” is also cruel and I personally don’t buy it. I have a bright view on life, you know…
May 29th, 2008
AriaB
I’m very interested in the philosophy of detachment. I just read a book entitled Distant Suffering (link to ebooks and audiobooks version), which provides a different take on detachment; it actually promotes becoming somewhat attached to people and causes which are currently just distant reports from the media. The book says that this will encourage you to change things in distant places, to fight against injustice and make the world a better place. I am torn; inner peace or world peace first?
Jun 3rd, 2008
Albert
Thank you Hardy, Roll Top Desk, and Ariab.
Ariab, I do believe in inner peace first. This is just my opinion - violence, no matter on what scale (between 2 people, or between 2 countries), stems from inner violence. If someone is genuinely happy, and not just a fake smile, they will handle difficulties and disagreements very differently than someone who is unhappy. People who are unhappy also tend to look to other things - oil, money, or whatever - to make them happy. I do not pretend to know anything about why wars are started, but I do believe that the happier you are, the less likely you are to go to war to get these things. It doesn’t mean that you don’t want to earn money or anything like that, but you’ll be less likely to resort to invasion or hurting another person to get it, you’ll be more likely to do something that is mutually beneficial. It’s 3am here and I’m dead tired, so I hope that makes sense.
Jun 3rd, 2008
Evan
Hi AriaB,
“When on the horns of a dilemma look for the bull in between.” We are social creatures. Our individual actions affect our little part of the world.
Having said this there are questions of scale. Even if hunger could be solved by each individual in the West shipping their surplus to Africa we would still need the shipping to be organised and to have a communication mechanism.
Violence is generally a response to and justified by (perceived) powerlessness.
As we encounter and remain open to the suffering of others, as we are appalled by the structural inequities and deal with our despair then we are dealing with our personal issues and personal sense of peace. “We learn to meditate in the tiger’s mouth.”
We can’t not be engaged with the world.
Trust this helps.
Jun 3rd, 2008
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