What your ego is and how to stop it from obscuring your inner peace and unconditional love
We would rather be right than be happy
The biggest reason would be the roles the ego plays. Some of the biggest and most universal roles are the roles of being right, being superior and being inferior. For people in the grip of their ego, they would rather be one of those than be at peace.
Why cant we let go of past arguments? Why cant we let go of past pains? Why do arguments make us lose our temper? Why do angry words draw a different reaction from us than loving words? Because they play into some of these roles and filters.
We are drawn to defend these roles. We would rather be right than happy. We would rather relive certain events, so we can feel justified so we can mentally come up with ways to defend ourselves. It doesnt matter that the event is in the past, that weve lost contact with all involved, that it wouldnt make a difference in the physical world.
In the same way, we would rather attack, gossip, condemn, and put down others so we can feel superior than be at peace. And strangely, we would also prefer to feel inferior than be at peace much of gossiping, celebrity worship, and other common day-to-day activities make us feel inferior.
To the little ego inside us, any identity is better than none, even if its a victim or a poor me identity.
How do we stop all this insanity?
The beginning of freedom – letting the thought pass
You already know the fastest way to set ourselves free from all this pain. By simply being aware that it is the thought that causes all your sorrow, youve taken the first step.
When you know how the thought works, you also know how it causes pain. When you can recognise the egos need to focus on that thought, to fight for its need to be right and to fight for its identity, you might find it amusing.
You realise that it is insane. It is insane to continue fighting even though the opponent is just an imaginary one. It is insane to be upset about and fight over a situation that is in your past and therefore doesnt exist any more. It is insane to fight and worry about a situation in the future, and so doesnt exist as well.
With this recognition, all you have to do is let it float by, like a productive thought. Sometimes you will slip and fall back, but thats only because it has been a habit of so many years. Once you have made this recognition and keep vigilance, youve begun to break free.
Reap the benefit of these thoughts. If it is a thought that makes you worry about the future, then take steps if necessary. Prepare for whatever worries you, then let the thought slide off. If it is pain about the past, then perhaps you are worried about it happening again. Take steps to prepare for that as well. If something is hurting you right now, reap the benefit and get the hell out! If you are freezing to death, get out! If someone is beating you, get out!