Editor’s note: This series is still helpful and practical, but contains some slightly out of date info. It reflects my journey and understanding at the time, which has evolved since then.

The initial euphoria is over. You’ve discovered the ego and seen how it causes sorrow. You now realise you can choose peace and not unhappiness. But there’s still something wrong. What is it? Confusion, resentment, fear? Perhaps even hate for the ego? These are some of the dangerous traps you can meet in your journey, and I have to address them right now.

Another part of egoic unhappiness that I have to discuss is egoic time. I hinted at it briefly before, but I will go into it in detail this time.

For those who don’t know what I’m talking about, this is a follow up to the original ego post. It has made a huge impact and it is definitely Urban Monk dot net’s flagship content. Please read it if you haven’t – it’s a huge post at 6000 words but definitely worth your time. I have received much feedback about the shifts it has made in the lives and joy of readers – but there have been just as many questions which highlighted to me the common dangers and obstacles. It is important I point these out for you now so you don’t fall prey to them.

Let’s get right into it.

The Ego remains

Disconnecting and disidentifying with the ego is an important first step – the most critical shift I have ever made in my life so far, and that’s no exaggeration. Once you’ve made the shift, you can’t go back. You might occasionally forget and become identified with it again, but that’s never permanent. It’s like finding out Santa didn’t exist – no matter how hard you try, you can never go back to believing in the old chimney-crawler again.

But for most people, the ego doesn’t disappear simply because you’ve recognised it. It is still very much a part of us – although most people wish otherwise. And that is the first trap.

Wanting to be egoless

We’ve already discussed how the ego can become dysfunctional and cause us sorrow and pain. The roles, the possessions, the memories, the worries, the defensiveness – these are all examples of how the ego hurts us.

When people recognise this, they start making it a goal to be egoless. Perfectly logical – but such a goal often comes from the ego itself, and strengthens it instead.

This is hard to explain. I’ll do my best, but leave a comment if you don’t get it and I’ll clarify further.

What is time?

“One day I shall be free of my ego.”

To understand the dangers of this goal, we first have to describe what time really is.

What is time to you? If you’re like most people, time is simply a series of moments. Seconds that leads into minutes and minutes into hours and hours into days.

But that view of time is an illusion. It’s like watching a movie. What is a movie, technically? A series of still images (called frames), presented in quick succession. It is only movement because you have been deceived into seeing it that way.

But all you are ever seeing is one frame. All you can ever see is one frame - the frame that you are seeing right now. Where are the previous frames? In your memory; your mind. Where are the future frames? Anticipation – also in your mind. They combine to form the illusion. But there is no future frame - when the future frame flashes on to your screen, it is already the current frame.

And that’s the way life really is. All you are ever living is right now. The past is memory, the future is anticipation – they don’t exist except in your head. When the future arrives, it is no longer the future, but now. Life is now, now is life.

Does that make sense? If it does, let’s move on.

Egoic time

Just as our mind creates the illusion of motion and cohesion in a movie, the ego tricks us into thinking that we have more to life than Now.

On the other hand, we cannot function practically without time. So to make things easier, let’s split time, both past and future, into two categories – the egoic and the non-egoic. If you’ve read the first ego post you should be able to distinguish between the two already.

I crashed my car last year because I was drink-driving. Now I always drink responsibly. That’s the non-egoic past, practical and vital for our survival.

I mentally replay arguments with an ex-girlfriend I haven’t seen for months. It brings me sorrow and anger over something that only exists in my head. That’s the egoic past, the source of emotional pain. And, it strengthens the ego.

What about the future? You plan to call your dentist tomorrow; you plan to wake up at 6 tomorrow so you can be on time for a job interview. That’s non-egoic future – practical and vital for your survival.

You need to make a million dollars before you can be happy. You need to find a lover so you can feel fulfilled. You are worried sick over the coming interview. That’s the egoic future, the source of emotional pain. It strengthens the ego.

“One day I shall be free of my ego.” Guess which category that falls under.

You are fighting life, for life is now

There is another way this causes pain. We’ve already discussed how the present moment is all we ever have. Peace cannot exist in the past or the future, for those don’t exist except in our minds. Peace is only possible now.

“One day I shall be free of my ego.”

Can you see the trouble in that statement?

What are you telling yourself? That you are not there yet. That there is something standing in the way of peace. That you can only be at peace in the future, and not NOW.

The solution

The solution should already be obvious if you have read this far. That’s right - there is nothing to strive for – not in the future, at least. The only thing you can strive for is to be as aware as you can – right now.

Be aware of the ego when it is taking over. Know that it’s the ego when you are overwhelmed with negative emotions, when you take on a role, when you feel compelled to argue, when you live in the future or remain stuck in the past. Be aware of the ego, and bypass it.

There are a few other ways we can anchor ourselves in the present, and turn off the mind and the ego when it starts to malfunction. I’ve discussed them in detail in How to be a Rock in a Chaotic World, so I won’t go into that again.

By turning off the mind, you’ve turned off the ego and therefore all false sense of time. You are completely in the moment, completely being alive - simply Being.

What’s next?

This was originally meant to be one quick post, but grew to incorporate discussions on egoic time and got so long I have to split it up. So watch for the next in this series, coming up real soon!

Sorry, I know I’m in the middle of the egoless series! But I have had a recent spate of emails regarding the ego, and I felt I had to address these obstacles immediately, before others suffer in the same way. While I did help out those who emailed me, not everyone who comes across these obstacles will contact me, and I don’t want them to make these mistakes! Sorry!